A Real Close Shave

A lot of good shaving does for me, according to my wife I am still ugly, (she still loves me). Anyway, I prefer to be a clean shaven ugly.

Until recently, the only way that I felt really clean shaven has been, for me, to go to a barber and have him shave me with a straight razor. That becomes pretty expensive since I shave every day. Ergo, that was out of the question, once I did the math. I figured that the standard price of $10 per shave plus a 2 buck tip – so that my throat isn't cut by "oops" – every day of the year except Sunday, the barbers day off. Well, so then I calculated the annual cost of this "best" shave possible, as I determined, compared to all of the other shaving methods. Here is what I did: there are 300 days / shaves X $12.00 a day, is $3600.00 a year. I know most people don’t shave every day, rarely for me, but I just wanted to prove to myself just how ridiculous it would be, for me, to get a very close shave every day. Needless to say, I, like most people opted to use a razor from Gillette and Schick.

I tried all of them, no kidding? I would not shave for weeks at a time, rather than try and scrape my ugly puss with one of those standard razors available at that time. Actually, I would rather use a rusty axe, the thought crossed my mind. No razor I tried, would shave me like the guy in the barber shop. They were all a joke and waste of time.

Then one day while shopping at my local warehouse club, I saw a new razor which caught my eye. I thought what the heck, may as well try it as I do believe in Miracles, the next morning I took my new found razor and gently started to shave; expecting the worst. Well, Voila was I surprised! It was actually doing what a razor is supposed to do, cleanly shave my face. I was really excited. Wow it works! I was like a kid with a new toy, I could not wait to shave the next day and lo and behold I got the same results, what is the name of this new miracle, hey all you guys out there, it's the – Schick Extreme 3.

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